Living in a seeking of secured certainty is not living in the present moment. Living in the present moment is really living in harmony with both the past, the present, and the future without avoiding or attaching to any one time state. We can be sure of what has happened in the past, but we realize there are always layers of truth which may be revealed, changing our understanding. We can feel intuitively sure of something which may happen in the future, but we realize that the future is largely uncertain and anything is possible. We can mindfully live awake and aware in the present, yet we know that our present moment is grounded not by attaching ourselves to “being present” but by opening ourselves to the continuum of totality which is all of life and all of life’s events. All of life and life’s events includes an absolute of uncertainty.
“As we practice moving into the present moment this way,” Pema Chodron writes in Comfortable With Uncertainty, “we become more familiar with groundlessness, a fresh state of being that is available to us on an ongoing basis.” Feeling ungrounded is not what someone who is recovering from trauma necessarily wants to be familiar with because feeling groundless, feeling uncertain, feeling unattached, are states all to familiar for those living as a trauma survivor, or in recovery from trauma. Chodron emphasizes that there is a flip side to this process of letting go- “This moving away from comfort and security, this stepping out into what is unknown, uncharted, and shaky- that’s called liberation.”
It seems ironic to think that someone who has lived in uncertainty as a result of trauma wouldn’t want to do whatever is necessary to find certainty, safety, and security in their lives, especially when considering that many do through destructive means. Letting go of harmful survival mechanisms means letting go of some of the only foundations of security trauma survivors have been able to hold onto for a long time. The idea of stepping into groundlessness again is more terrifying because of the illusion of security survival mechanisms have provided. What we come to learn in trauma recovery is that by letting go and taking great leaps of faith, we are able to find the truest security and safety in our lives through healthy means. We trust our care providers, build a network of supporters, and find a peaceful way to live safely in an uncertain world.
Trauma is most often the root cause of many emotional, behavioral, and mood disorders. Until you can heal your trauma, you will find great difficulty finding the healing you need to live a life of recovery, health, and wellness. At Khiron House, we provide effective residential treatment and cutting edge therapies which seek to transform mind, body, and spirit from the effects of trauma. Call us today for information. UK: 020 3811 2575 (24 hours) USA: (866) 801 6184 (24 hours).