When loved ones are struggling with trauma or mental health issues, it can be difficult to know how to help. When they are suffering in silence – staying quiet about their mental distress, it can be even harder. While there is no set roadmap to helping people overcome mental illness, there are strategies and considerations that can make it clearer.
We outline a few below for you to help you and your loved ones on your journey.
1. Listen Carefully to What They Tell You
Listening is one of the most powerful tools you can offer someone who is struggling. It’s essential to give them your undivided attention and allow them to express themselves fully without interruption. When they share their thoughts or feelings, repeat back what you’ve heard to ensure you comprehend their perspective accurately.
This practice not only clarifies any misunderstandings but also conveys that you value their experience. Even if you may not agree with their viewpoint, acknowledging their emotions demonstrates respect and validation. By fostering an environment where they feel heard, you empower your loved one to share more openly. This connection can be crucial in helping them feel less isolated in their struggles, encouraging them to communicate their needs and emotions more freely.
2. Help Them Seek Professional Support
Encouraging a loved one to seek professional help can be daunting, especially if they are hesitant or fearful. Start by gently discussing the potential benefits of therapy, such as gaining coping skills and understanding their emotions. Offer to assist them in finding a suitable therapist or counsellor and, if they’re open to it, accompany them to their first appointment for support.
This gesture can significantly reduce feelings of anxiety or apprehension about seeking help. Emphasise that the decision to pursue therapy ultimately lies with them, ensuring they feel empowered and in control of their journey. Respecting their choices fosters trust and reinforces that they have agency in their healing process. By actively participating in this journey, you help to normalise the experience of seeking help, reminding them that reaching out is a sign of strength rather than weakness.
3. Remember Mental Health Challenges Can Make Them Feel Unworthy of Love
Individuals with mental health difficulties often become hypersensitive to how their emotions and actions impact those around them. Your loved one may withdraw, cancel plans, or seem emotionally distant, which can feel like rejection. Recognize that these behaviours stem from their internal struggles, not their feelings toward you.
Consistently reaching out, even when they seem distant, reassures them of your unconditional love and support. Small gestures—like sending a text to check in or inviting them to join you for a casual outing—can act as a reminder that they are cared for and worthy of connection. It’s crucial to communicate that their mental health challenges do not define their worth and that everyone deserves support, love, and understanding. By fostering an environment of acceptance, you can help break the cycle of unworthiness, encouraging them to feel more secure in their relationships.
4. Be Patient and Understanding
Patience is vital when supporting someone with mental health issues, as the journey to healing is often non-linear and filled with ups and downs. Your loved one may have days when they seem optimistic and engaged, followed by days when they withdraw or struggle significantly.
Understanding that this fluctuation is a natural part of the healing process can help you manage your own expectations and responses. Offer your support without pressure, allowing them to take the lead in their healing journey. Remind them that setbacks do not signify failure; rather, they are a part of growth and recovery.
Practising patience can create a safe environment where they feel comfortable expressing their emotions, knowing that you will stand by them through both the highs and lows. Your consistent presence during difficult times can be a powerful source of comfort, reinforcing their belief that they are not alone in their struggles.
5. Create a Safe Space for Expression
Establishing a safe space for open communication is crucial in supporting your loved one. Encourage them to share their feelings, fears, and experiences without the fear of judgement or criticism. You might say, “I’m here for you, and I want to understand what you’re going through.”
Allow them to express themselves fully, even if their thoughts seem disorganised or difficult to articulate. By actively listening and validating their emotions, you create an atmosphere of trust that fosters deeper connection. You can also share your own experiences, as this may help them feel less alone.
However, it’s essential to ensure the conversation remains centred on their feelings rather than shifting the focus to your own. Remember to be mindful of their cues—if they seem overwhelmed, it’s okay to take a step back and allow for silence or a change of subject. This balance can cultivate a supportive relationship where both individuals feel safe and valued.
6. Educate Yourself on Their Struggles
Understanding your loved one’s specific mental health challenges can significantly enhance the support you provide. Take the time to research their conditions, such as anxiety disorders, depression, or PTSD, to grasp their symptoms, triggers, and coping mechanisms. Knowledge empowers you to respond with empathy and effectiveness, helping you discern between typical behaviour and signs that your loved one may need additional support.
Engaging with articles, books, or reputable online resources can provide insight into their experiences and how these might manifest in daily life. You can also attend workshops or support groups focused on mental health, which can deepen your understanding and create opportunities for connection with others navigating similar experiences. Additionally, discussing your findings with your loved one can lead to open conversations about their feelings and experiences, further fostering a supportive environment where they feel heard and understood.
7. Encourage Healthy Coping Mechanisms
Helping your loved one develop healthy coping mechanisms is essential for their recovery. Discuss various strategies that promote emotional well-being, such as physical activity, mindfulness, creative expression, or journaling. Engaging in these activities together can make the process more enjoyable and strengthen your bond. For instance, you might invite them to go for a walk or attend a yoga class, providing both physical activity and an opportunity to connect.
Encouraging self-care routines, such as proper sleep, nutrition, and relaxation techniques, can also be beneficial. It’s important to tailor these suggestions to their preferences, ensuring they feel empowered to explore what works best for them, perhaps even engaging in these activities with them. You might even suggest setting small, achievable goals together to foster a sense of accomplishment and motivation. By promoting healthy coping strategies, you can support their journey toward improved mental health while fostering a sense of agency in their healing process.
8. Be Mindful of Your Reactions
Your reactions to your loved one’s emotions can significantly influence their willingness to share. Practice calmness and empathy, especially when they reveal something challenging. If they express sadness or frustration, responding with understanding rather than attempting to fix the situation can validate their feelings. Avoid minimising their experiences or suggesting that they should simply “get over it.” Instead, acknowledge their emotions and let them know it’s okay to feel how they do.
Phrases like “It’s understandable that you feel this way” can provide comfort and affirmation. By modelling a calm and empathetic demeanour, you create a safe space for your loved one to express themselves. This approach encourages them to open up further, knowing that their feelings will be met with compassion. Mindfulness about your reactions can foster deeper trust, allowing for more meaningful conversations and support.
Mental Health Support with Khiron Clinics
If you know someone struggling, and are looking for an individualised approach to mental health and trauma treatment, Khiron Clinics can provide tailored care that addresses the root causes of their distress.
Offering specialised therapies for trauma, anxiety, and other mental health challenges, Khiron Clinics is a valuable resource for individuals seeking professional help.
With a focus on holistic and integrative approaches, the clinic provides a safe and nurturing environment where your loved one can begin to heal. Encouraging them to explore professional treatment options like this, while continuing to offer your support, can be a powerful step toward their recovery and well-being. Helping them access the right care demonstrates your commitment to their mental health journey.
